If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
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