No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
