she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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