theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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