it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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