is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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