You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize