i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Randomize
