No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
