glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
