actually, I'm a sock model
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
