Christians are straight up FREAKS
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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