soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
