Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
