i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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