party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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