just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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