smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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