i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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