South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
