So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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