i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
If I die, sorry about rent.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize
