i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Randomize
