i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
