you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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