They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
