I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
