dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
