update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
