Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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