Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
