I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
you win again, gameday.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Randomize
