I wanna passion pit in your ass
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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