Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize
