You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
