And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
my god I love twenty year old dicks
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
