yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
