I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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