No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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