didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I'd cum for enchiladas.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize