google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
