Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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