Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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