love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
