its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
