What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I touched a dick in church today
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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