friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
