"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
