i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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