my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
