So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Randomize
